I’m going to say it – Aliens is Shit, Absolutely shit! It is a bag full of crap – that is if we are talking about aliens as a romantic movie
but glad we’re not talking romantic bollocks on this channel!
What is that sound…
Probably one of the most recognised sounds in sci-fi history, the motion tracker and at this moment right now it is tracking Jennifer I love myself talking bollocks about how amazing she is right now!
So
Let’s Rock!
Aliens Aliens Aliens
The sequel to the original Ridley Scott’s Alien
It is a totally different movie from The first film – alien which was more of a suspense horror flick, which I don’t want to go into detail about but I will review that one soon so stay tuned.
This sequel film was directed and written by the legendary Jimmy Cameroon and selected an amazing cast for this film
So let’s recap the Alien’s story.
Ripley is woken up from hypersleep 57 Earth years later from the first movie. She gets a bollocking from blowing up a multi-million dollar starship from the big business corp guys and a few days after that meeting they lose contact with the folks living on LV426 interesting…
RIPLEY also has recurring dreams of her previous ordeal with the first alien
so she gets persuaded to join a team of the meanest badass on earth as an expert in xenomorpthectoplasm – is that a word? It is now
to fly back and destroy the aliens once and for all, she agrees to join this team of badasses as she wants to face her personal fears but not to study the aliens, not to engineer, not to make love to and defo not use as a weapon
but to wipe them out – all off them
So Ripley and the rest of the gang fly to lv 426 and as they wake up, we as the audience learn the crew of the badass marines INSERT
and all their great catchphrases
Then they learn the mission and laugh and take the piss out off Ripley, Ripley knows the score, and her thicked skinned character is praying these marines know what they’re talking about
So they land on the planet where all the colonists have disappeared and you know what, Im going to stop right here as I don’t want to spoil it for those that have not seen it.
but basically, a trained marine team have never encountered what is about to happen to them.
Negatives of this film
There are hardly any negatives unless you really look, Like what happened to the beckon from the first film? that’s how they found the alien spacecraft in the first place, no mention of it here
or how the fucking hell does the first marine that gets killed get carried up like 50 feet in the air with the alien having no contact with anything
must have had a long tail
just little niggling things like that!
but there is 1 negative that really gets to me and I don’t know why, I personally think it’s the worst line in cinema history.
It is when after the first contact and they escape and then their pickup spaceship crashes and in all the stress and excitement
Burke tries to get everyone to build a fire and sing a few songs…
Can you imagine that all these hard marines and their only way out back to the mother ship
has just exploded and Burke wants them to build a campfire and sing a few fucking songs?
Maybe Burke was supposed to be stressed out in shock but I think this didn’t work for the film and is total cheese
Burke should have been in the background nervous covering his eyes cause he’s a shitbag! but fair play he is good at being a wanker. He played a great part that you actually hate him! Credit to Paul Riming for playing a big jerk and he did it well
The Positives of this film
Where do I start? I’ll tell you now, this whole review was late because every time I was editing, I got lost in watching the clips of this amazing film! I really did. that’s a true story
I don’t have the time to tell you all the many positives, so I gone to make it short
Fantastic effects that still live up today and the crafting of the special effects team in this world is applauded by me being a nerd! real special effects work wonders.
Fantastic cast and every one of these cast delivers and they feed off each other, most of them all have a love-hate relationship but you actually feel they all respect each other.
a fantastic storyline, fantastic action, fantastic drama, fantastic suspense, fantastic horror bits and fantastic music score
Then all the amazing quotes in this film, I’ll give it my best shot
“Alright Sweethearts, You Heard The Man And You Know The Drill! A**holes And Elbows!”
“What The Hell Are We Supposed To Use, Man? Harsh Language?”
and especially “Game Over, Man! Game Over!”
but my personal favourite is
“It’s a rescue mission, you’ll love it. We have to rescue some juicy colonists’ daughters from their virginity.
I Hope Jennifer Lawrance is one
Overall this film
Aliens is a sci-fi fan’s wet dream, it is a film that has everything you want in a film. It is one of the best sci-fi films I have ever seen and it will live a long time.
It does not matter if it is the special edition or the theatre cut, I do prefer the special edition, just that little bit more action especially love the sentry guns, do you prefer the special edition or not?
My score is this
Geez this movie is the fricking Beez Knees
It is a solid 5 out of 5, with no question
I could easily watch this film at least once a year and still not be bored
If you have never seen this film, buy it and buy it right now that’s an order
Do you agree? did you love the film more than me? or did you hate it, would love to hear your cheese so comment with your own expertise.
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