Lee Geez

Im a Meat Popsicle

Warning this video contains 2 after-sex scenes and some humour that sensitive people might find offensive so please don’t watch buttercups

The Fifth Element Review, A Sci-Fi film that is a total mess and totally Bonkers, is like Stilton Cheese, You Either love it or hate it and I do like my cheese

One-off the most comic sci-fi films I have ever seen and what’s it like today? Is it stupid? Is it a classic? Find out in this review

Let’s Recap the plot

Every 5000 Years a Super Evil wakes up and wants to destroy and kill all life on earth, It is power hungry, arrogant, strong, egotistical, ignorant, racist, narcissistic, does not care about anyone or anything and an enormous fat evil that looks at this thing would instantly make you want to throw up and here it is in full colour

No, No not that one this one >

The main plot is set in New York City in the 23rd century and to stop this evil thing from destroying the earth we have the 5 elements – Earth, Fire, Water, Air and the last one is embodied on the superhuman Leeloo

Leeloo Is played by the super sexy Milla Jovowitness’s

Knock Knock

She wakes up and falls literary into the path of Korben Dallas who is played by the legend ….errr hang on mmmm it will come to me

5 hours later tick tock

Ahhh Bruce Willies

So Dallas gets involved with Leeloo on the quest of getting the 4 over elements and destroying the big fat evil thing heading towards the earth

video

Obviously, it is not going to be easy but with the help of Father Vito Cornelius (played by Bilbo Baggins himself) and the help of the complete wack job radio broadcaster Ruby Rod (played by Smokey)

So they have to get the four elements against the race of time and against a lousy co-operation guy called Zorg

Zorg wants to help the evil entity and with help from his alien friends wants to find the 4 elements before Leeloo finds them

and that’s the basis of the film’s plot.

The Negatives of this film are:-

The storyline is a bit messed up, I just can’t understand why the evil Zorg wants to help this evil thing that’s going to wipe out all humanity and himself,

Is he dying already and thinking frick it, might as well take the ship down with me, doesn’t really explain it in the film, I have googled it but it still to me makes no sense. Correct me if I’m wrong

Chris Tucker’s character, the zany ruby rrod is just that little bit too much, it is like having Jar-Jar Binks having a few lines of coke.

The writers of the screenplay make The president of the world (played by dee-boo) as thick as two short planks Or maybe dee-boo is still a stoner? Even Corban Dallas’s Mother thinks so too…

They should off made him like a real asshole, A real leader

The Positives of the film

Mila Jovovich Playing Leeloo, and still, probably her best-played character to date

She looks amazing, Meeeeeow she is stunning in this film, especially when she first meets Dallas in the back of his taxi cab and starts talking Alien Jibberish she is so cute, You can tell Dallas has fallen for her straight away! Like I did

I would like to take a few pictures for my wankbank errr I mean research

Mila is very good in all her fight scenes, she looks like she could handle herself very well – Did I mention in this film she is a cute, sexy, and gorgeous and cute, sexy and gorgeous, cute, sexy and gorgeous, lush sexy dream

Bruce Willies playing John McLane again, He is good at this role and why not, who doesn’t like Bruce willies

Gary Baldmen, who plays zorg! Is there any role that Gary can’t do? He is just an awesome actor – Cheese below

The vision of the future, looks stunning, with shots with proper practical effects. It really does look gorgeous even if it looks comical and also CGI works well when there’s so less of it, less is more as they say

This future looked like “especially where we’re going in 2023” to be real. The designs and the outfits are all absurd but totally work for this film, just for this film people

Some really good zany comedy in this film especially when everybody all hiding in Dallas’s little flat

Overall this film

The fifth Element is a science fiction film that you can’t take too seriously, some people do, and some people don’t. It stepped out of the usual bog standard sci-fiction movies

This is a fun enjoyable wacky film that is not trying to be serious

When this film first came out, I loved it but today not so much

It is a good film, but no way near a masterpiece and I watch probs every 5 years

I personally recommend you rent this film first before you buy it

Overall it is Geez its good with little cheese Good 3 out of 5

Do you agree? did you love the film more than me? or did you hate it, would love to hear your cheese so comment with your own expertise?

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